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You Didn’t Even Know Them!

It’s funny to me how people feel they can dictate how one should grieve. “Oh, so and so has been dead for YEARS and his sister cries everyday!” Or “It doesn’t take all of that!” Or (and this is my favorite one), “You didn’t even know him/her!” WOW! And this is why I say, lately, it’s been hard to like humans.

People are mourning the unfortunate death of the great basketball player Kobe Bryant. Fans and foes alike, are in utter shock over what seems to be such an untimely death. Social media has become flooded with RIP’s, SIP’s, kind words, sad face and broken heart emojis, and more. Of course, there’s been a sprinkle of ignorance included which led to this post and question; why is it so hard to understand that people can mourn the loss of someone they’ve never met? You should never question someone’s emotions when it comes to death! NEVER!

Am I a die hard basketball watcher? Nope! Do I spew out stats the way commentators do? Nope! Do I know the exact date basketball season even starts? Nope! But here is why Kobe Bryant’s death hurts me:

I can remember early in his career, my family compared him to my cousin Maurice. Those memories led to more memories of watching my cousins Maurice and Michael play basketball and later laughing at how long it took Michael to get up off of the ground or the court floor. And those memories led to my whole family getting together at my mom’s house, after watching them play, to eat, drink, and laugh some more. You see, The Black Mamba, reminds me of how his games would cause a friendly divide in our family, which brought along the trash talking, which brought along more laughs. Some were #teamKobe. Some were #teamLebron. Some refused to leave #teamJordan. But it was all in fun!

You should never question a person’s emotions when it comes to grief. I get it. You might look at me and for the life of you not understand why I shed tears over Bryant’s death. But it’s not meant for you to understand. Nor is it meant for me to understand your tears. Emotions, feelings, and tears are personal. You don’t know what may spark them in someone. I would like to suggest that you keep your cynical comments to yourself, especially when it comes to grief! For the sad truth is, if you haven’t faced it before, you most certainly WILL!



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